


Wilbur Mpreg

by st4ll_ing (w3t_h4nds)



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: 2020 L'Manberg Election on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), Based on a Lady Gaga Song, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Implied Mpreg, Song fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-14 00:15:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29659509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/w3t_h4nds/pseuds/st4ll_ing
Summary: [THIS IS NOT A PROBLEMATIC WORK. THIS IS A JOKE FIC.]It's election day, and things couldn't go more wrong for Wilbur and Tommy.
Comments: 26
Kudos: 17





	Wilbur Mpreg

Tommy was in disbelief. Not only had they lost the election for their own country, they had lost it by 1 per cent! How humiliating was that?

Wilbur, while clearly sharing his opinion, was taking this a lot better than he was, and was desperately trying to get the shocked teen to leave the president’s podium, and to take his seat amongst the people that they used to rule.

“Come on, Tommy. We lost, just accept it. Look, there’s a seat right there, calm down, alright?” Wilbur said, the hand he rested on Tommy’s shoulder tense, but grounding. He gave a single, curt nod, as he made his way towards the forest of heads, to take a seat.

It took a bit of time to get everyone settled, but soon everyone had focused their attention towards their new president, one Jay Schlatt. Said man grinned, his sharp teeth visible, and if one was to pay special attention to his eyes, they’d see sparks of something sinister, and something more pure, more defined, but at the same time so much more muddled.

After a few moments, which everyone used to stare up at their newly elected leader, anxiety fogging the air, he spoke.

“That was pretty easy. And you know what I said, the day I got unbanned from the DreamSMP, and the day I said I was running... an election that I won by the way? I said; "Things are gonna change". I looked every citizen of L'Manberg in the eyes and I said; "You listen to me... this place will be a lot different tomorrow." Let's start making it happen. My first decree, as the president of L'Manberg- the EMPEROR! of th-”

Suddenly, he stopped. His eyes, one sharp and maniacal, were now cursed with a one hundred-yard stare. His smile dropped. It seemed like his body had just stopped working, and nobody knew what was going on.

A few people threw their heads back to peer over behind them, hoping to see what shocking thing Schlatt had noticed, while others whispered nervously with their neighbours. The question on everyone’s mind was simple; What was going on?

Everyone is nervous, wondering what’s wrong, when backup dancers, more specifically the tiger dancers from Zootopia and also Quackity and Eret for some reason (they are both SO confused as to how they’re dancing), suddenly appear and a song starts to play. Then it all goes to crap.

Suddenly, like something out of a movie, eight large, anthropomorphic tigers appeared from the shadows. Each tiger had thick, muscled arms, and equally muscled lean bodies. They looked, for a lack of better words, strong, and that would’ve been intimidating if it wasn’t for the kind and excited expressions their faces pulled. They were easily recognised as the tigers from Zootopia.

In the middle of the line, were two friends they hadn’t realised had left the group, Quackity and Eret. They were an extreme contrast to the rest of the line, with their thin and lanky bodies, and Quackity stuck out like a sore thumb due to his height. They both had expressions of shock, as if they had absolutely no idea how they’d ended up there, and fear, as if their bodies were moving on their own.

Everyone held their breaths.

Finally, a song started to echo out over the festival. It was too loud, too crisp to have come from any speaker, and it wasn’t long until everyone realised that the song was coming from Schlatt, playing from his very body, as the man slipped back into reality.

He started to dance, a small jig, but noticeable nonetheless. He bounced slightly to the beat, shifting his weight between his feet, lightly swinging his hips.

And then he started to sing.

“I stand here waiting for you to bang the gong, to crash the critic saying, is it right or is it wrong?"

Shock spread across the crowd. Schlatt was singing. It felt like a dream and a nightmare at the same time. Some of them expected it to stop. Someone even prayed to Prime that it would.

Their prayers weren’t answered. Nothing could save them now.

“If only fame had an I.V, baby could I bear?” He leant back slightly on the balls of his feet, his hand slowly panning across the crowd. “Being away from you, I found the vein, put it in here!”

A small pause, as he suddenly snatched his hand back, doing a small twirl as he returned to standing normally.

“I live for the applause, applause, applause, I live for the applause-plause, live for the applause-plause, live for the-”

His hand went to the skies, forming a fist as he grinned.

“Way that you cheer and scream for me, the applause, applause, applause..”

His hand was, yet again, snatched back, and moved towards his suit. With inhuman strength, it was pulled apart, ripped to shreds, revealing a bedazzled red bodycon dress, which sparkled in a thousand different directions at every minute movement.   
It was at that moment, the crowd’s shocked silence turned into cheers, cries, screams of praise, and the thundering boom of so many pairs of hands clapping in unison.  
It was at that moment, Schlatt truly sang.

“Give me that thing that I love,I'll turn the lights out!” His voice was powerful, commanding, and elegant. They all stared at him in awe, their voices growing louder and louder and their clapping only becoming more prominent with the addition of stamping feet.  
Schlatt turned, spinning into the arms of a tiger, who picked him up, and began spinning back into the centre of the stage. Quackity and Eret were still dancing, but they seemed to be enjoying it, instead of their previous shock.  
“Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch, make it real loud! Give me that thing that I love, I'll turn the lights out! Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch make it real loud!”  
The tiger completed one last spin, and released Schlatt, the man falling into a front split, before gracefully rising again. With one last twist, Schlatt started throwing it back. The crowd screamed their praises.  
“Make it real loud! Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch, A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E! Make it real loud! Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch!”  
After the first chorus had ended, the song started to fade into silence. It was clear that there wouldn’t be any more, but the crowd cried for an encore. Schlatt simply grinned.  
“As I was saying, my first decree, as the emperor of L'Manberg, is to REVOKE the citizenship of WilburSoot, and TommyInnit! Get 'em outta here! Get 'em outta here! You're no longer welcome!" It carried the same air of a singer thanking their fans for showing up to their performance. And what a bitter-sweet performance it was, for the ex-president and his vice.  
It appeared that the crowd of people, who should’ve been throwing them from their seats, chasing them away, were too busy staring up at Schlatt like he was some sort of deity. However, Wilbur barely had enough time to pull Tommy up, and to run away in the opposite direction, before they came to their senses, and started to hunt them down.

Wilbur knew he should’ve been scared. Wilbur knew he should’ve been furious. Yet all he could feel was a familiar heat.

And he knew what that meant.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / /

“Congrats, Mr. Soot. It’s a healthy girl.” the doctor said, handing him a bundle almost as big as him.

Wilbur’s eyes were soft as he was handed his too-big child, cooing slightly at her. He turned it away from his chest, the bass guitar’s polish glinting in the soft light.

He started to rock it, slowly, staring at it like it was his entire world.

A soft smile formed on his weary features, and he allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief.


End file.
